Skinny Will
Attention..Disorder..Shit
Alright so the other night i couldnt really sleep, it was like 230 in the morning and i was watching TV when this girl named Crystal texted me
"hey whats up?"
so we were just texting back and forth for like half an hour when she randomly sends me a text that only says "uuuuuuggghhhh"
of course i asked her what was wrong. she said she was frustrated. and when i asked what she was frustrated about she goes "i haven't been laid in over a month. i can't seem to find a fuck buddy and im tired of doing it myself"
jackpot
im usually not the forward kind of person, but seeing how i haven't gotten laid in a little over a month too, i have a feeling that if there's any time to be blunt it's now.
so i say "haha, well if you ever need a fuck buddy i'm always here for you"
in any real world situation, this probably isnt the best way to let a girl know that you would rail the shit out of her. but in this case i get a text back that says "always?"
i say "for the most part, yeah"
she goes "now?"
SCORE
i quickly send a message that goes "be there in 20 minutes" when i rush to the shower cause my balls smelled like a high school locker room. i quickly get a text back that says "hurry"
she lives 15 minutes away so i need to do this quick.
fucking record time i take a shower in a good 30 seconds, and shave my shit in probably 2 minutes.
i get dressed, and realize "fuck, i live with my parents."
and then i realized "fuck, so does she"
i texted her and asked her where and she said that her place is a no go. i said fuck it and decided that i didnt give a shit if my parents walked in on me. its happened before so whatever. but i still had to pick her ass up cause she doesnt have a car
so i hop in the supra (of course to get teh womenz) and start heading over to her place.
when i get there and texted her and said that i was in front of her house.
about a minute later i get a text that says
"idk if this is a good idea."
UHHHH...WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY?
like this bitch suddenly pulled morals out of her ass.
i start thinking. "aw hell no. its okay, maybe i can talk her back into it"
i tried pulling all of the cards i could to talk her back into it. trying to make it seem like it would mean something, then when that didnt work i tried to pull the, "its a casual thing, there's nothing wrong with that" card.
that didnt work
i ran out of ideas, didnt know wtf to do or say. tried to do the "we can just try it, and if you feel uncomfortable we can stop" thing. because i know that if she agreed to that, she wouldnt want to stop. (if you know what i mean, lol)
well that didnt work either
so then i get pissed
i go
"so you text me at 3 in the morning saying you wanna fuck, and then when i pull my ass off my comfy ass couch and come over you tell me that you thought about it and decided it wasnt what you wanted to do?"
do you know what she says?
"yes"
thats it
thats fucking it
YES is all she fucking says.
WHAT THE FUCK
so now im sitting in the supra with a half chub going, pissed off because this bitch basically played with my ball sack and told me to finish my self off.
thats grade A bull shit
its safe to say, im never talking to her again.
i hope you enjoyed the story, there's really no good ending to it besides i went home and fapped it.
"hey whats up?"
so we were just texting back and forth for like half an hour when she randomly sends me a text that only says "uuuuuuggghhhh"
of course i asked her what was wrong. she said she was frustrated. and when i asked what she was frustrated about she goes "i haven't been laid in over a month. i can't seem to find a fuck buddy and im tired of doing it myself"
jackpot
im usually not the forward kind of person, but seeing how i haven't gotten laid in a little over a month too, i have a feeling that if there's any time to be blunt it's now.
so i say "haha, well if you ever need a fuck buddy i'm always here for you"
in any real world situation, this probably isnt the best way to let a girl know that you would rail the shit out of her. but in this case i get a text back that says "always?"
i say "for the most part, yeah"
she goes "now?"
SCORE
i quickly send a message that goes "be there in 20 minutes" when i rush to the shower cause my balls smelled like a high school locker room. i quickly get a text back that says "hurry"
she lives 15 minutes away so i need to do this quick.
fucking record time i take a shower in a good 30 seconds, and shave my shit in probably 2 minutes.
i get dressed, and realize "fuck, i live with my parents."
and then i realized "fuck, so does she"
i texted her and asked her where and she said that her place is a no go. i said fuck it and decided that i didnt give a shit if my parents walked in on me. its happened before so whatever. but i still had to pick her ass up cause she doesnt have a car
so i hop in the supra (of course to get teh womenz) and start heading over to her place.
when i get there and texted her and said that i was in front of her house.
about a minute later i get a text that says
"idk if this is a good idea."
UHHHH...WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY?
like this bitch suddenly pulled morals out of her ass.
i start thinking. "aw hell no. its okay, maybe i can talk her back into it"
i tried pulling all of the cards i could to talk her back into it. trying to make it seem like it would mean something, then when that didnt work i tried to pull the, "its a casual thing, there's nothing wrong with that" card.
that didnt work
i ran out of ideas, didnt know wtf to do or say. tried to do the "we can just try it, and if you feel uncomfortable we can stop" thing. because i know that if she agreed to that, she wouldnt want to stop. (if you know what i mean, lol)
well that didnt work either
so then i get pissed
i go
"so you text me at 3 in the morning saying you wanna fuck, and then when i pull my ass off my comfy ass couch and come over you tell me that you thought about it and decided it wasnt what you wanted to do?"
do you know what she says?
"yes"
thats it
thats fucking it
YES is all she fucking says.
WHAT THE FUCK
so now im sitting in the supra with a half chub going, pissed off because this bitch basically played with my ball sack and told me to finish my self off.
thats grade A bull shit
its safe to say, im never talking to her again.
i hope you enjoyed the story, there's really no good ending to it besides i went home and fapped it.
icard:
